PALMDALE - Teri Biggs' New Year will be markedly different from the one she had only last year when she was in the hospital recovering from cancer surgery. Diagnosed with pancreatic cancer that has since spread to her liver, Biggs' 1997 celebration will be different from any she has ever had.
"I used to think that the new year was nothing more than remembering to write the correct year on my checks. Now, I don't take New Year's for granted - or anything else for that matter," the 41-year old Biggs said.
Surrounded by her husband Tom, 40, their 5-year old daughter Elizabeth and numerous friends, Biggs spent New Year's Day 1996 at Antelope Valley Hospital after doctors removed her pancreas, spleen, gall bladder and half her stomach on Dec. 27.
"You'd be surprized what you really don't need." she said. "The pancreas is the only one of those things you really need. Losing it made me an insulin dependent diabetic."
At first, Biggs gave herself insulin shots until an endocrinologist outfitted her with an insulin pump attached to her abdomen. "There are no super highs and lows anymore; it's pretty much normal," she said.
As much as possible, Biggs carried on her regular routine, until August when she was told the cancer had metastized to her liver.
"Up until then, I pretty much thought we had it beat. There had always been some discomfort from the surgery, so that's what I put the pains to."
Under the care of a UCLA doctor who specializes in pancreatic cancer. Biggs had a catheter implanted in her chest and wears a chemotherapy pump 24 hours a day. "Sometimes I can go a week and a half without having to unhook because of the side effects. It's not nice stuff; it causes mouth sores, nosebleeds, nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, and burning on the soles of my feet and the palms of my hands."
"It's interesting that you see people on television that are given a short time to live and they want to do things like jump out of an airplane or travel extensively. Chances are you're not going to have the energy to do all those things in order to live life to the fullest. I've found what's important to me is spending time with family and friends or simply watching a bird fly by.
"People that are closest mean the most.The simple things are what living is about. I don't have the energy to do the things I once could. I can't handle walking with the crowd at the mall.
"Christmas used to be a time when I'd get so busy and never get to enjoy it. This year I was able to sit back and enjoy it. This is what's good; we don't have to be in a rush to get someplace."
Two years ago when Teri, Tom and Elizabeth moved to Antelope Valley for Tom's engineering work as a Northrup defense contractor, Teri made friends when she joined the West Palmdale Mom's club. The club provides camaraderie for moms who have chosen to stay home with their children and be full-time mothers. They get together for field trips, children's play groups and evening gatherings.
"No man is an island. I have my family and friends who care very much what happens to me. The best I can do for them is fight to survive. I have my own little war on cancer right now. When people give in, or give up, it's over. I have a lot to fight for."
Last fall, Teri's club friends held a fund raiser "just to give us money to do some things we wanted. They have been wonderful. They brought us meals, and best of all, they've stuck with us."
When we first came here we were adopted right away by so many people and made so many friends right off the bat. The Antelope Valley has a great sense of community, and comming here was just a godsend for us."
Teri has beaten the odds to be here a year after her surgery, and she said that only 1% of pancreatic cancer patients survive five years. "Medical science has made great inroads, but they still haven't found a cure. I really think the cure comes from inside us. Attitude is the one thing we have to do for ourselves. So is prayer.
"Before my surgery I prayed for the strength to handle whatever it was, and my prayer was definitely answered. I have all the intentions of surviving this stuff. Even after I found out the cancer spread, I just picked myself up and dusted myself off.
"We have to accept death, because when , where, who and why is yet to be known. One thing that having a disease like cancer does is give you the ability to reprioritize what's important in your life. I could be hit by a bus tomorrow, but having had cancer made life seem more real. Not everyone has that opportunity.
For Teri, the sun "seems to shine brighter now. I notice it more and I love watching it. We have a very sunny living room where I love to sit and let the eastern sun shine in to me. In the morning our two cats are moving about as the birds fly by. It's just sweet.
"I definitely believe in angels. I feel we are protected by them, The people in my support group at the American Cancer Society are angels and each one of us can be an angel.
"In the support group, you don't have to explain your feelings - everyone there knows. We have a lot of Kleenex around. All of us have a common cause in that we're trying to survive this and do it the best way we can."
Teri and Tom have been honest with Elizabeth, who attends kindergarten at Desert Christian School. They explained the situation to her and try to keep an optimistic outlook for her.
"She has good and bad days, and she's much happier on days that I'm feeling well. I'm really glead she's at Desert Christian because on days when I'm too sick to get up and say goodbye in the morning, she goes to school and cries. Then her teacher comes to her and they kneel and pray. They also have after-school care, so that's another reason it all worked out well. Elizabeth is a great reason to keep going.
"I'm living for the moment, but only to a point. I've made plans for a family reunion in July. My parents and Tom's parents are already gone, but he has a brother and sister in Allabama and I have two brothers in Dallas. I aslo want to visit friends in Virginia where Tom and I used to live.
"I keep thinking it's strange of me to make plans so far in advance. I hated my 40th birthday; I loved my 41st. Now, every time I can add a candle to my birthday cake I'm in hog heaven."
Tom and Teri will have been married nine years in April. "Our family isn't a large one, so we made sure Elizabeth has a strong sense of family with the little bit she does have. As long as we're together, that's our family. And that's what's important this new year and every other."
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